These three are perhaps the mental pillars of playing well. While I’ve known this for decades, I recently read a book that really reiterated this. I kept hearing about the book Inner Excellence: Train Your Mind For Extraordinary Performance and the Best Possible Life by Jim Murphy, a former professional baseball player. I finally decided to buy and read it. It was pretty good, though of course some of it is similar to what various sports psychology books suggest, but it put a lot of good info together. Page 54 emphasizes BFF - Belief, Focus, Freedom (i.e., play free). What does this mean?

• Belief – You must believe in yourself. If there is any doubt, your subconscious picks up on this, leading to hesitant or erratic play. It’s not a matter of waiting until you play well and then believing in yourself; you must believe in yourself first, and go from there. Once you can do this, your play will improve, and you’ll have even more reason to believe in yourself – and it’s a self-fulfilling prophesy as you ride it to the top.
• Focus – You have to clear your mind. If you have other things on your mind while playing, or aren’t really concentrating, your play will suffer. 
• Freedom – You have to let yourself go and play freely. Don’t try to consciously control your play; let your training take over. Your conscious mind should only operate between points, and only on simple tactics. Otherwise, just focus on watching the ball and let your training do its job.

Let me start by being absolutely clear – you should take all serious matches seriously. That may sound like circular reasoning, taking serious matches seriously, but they have slightly different meanings. “Serious matches” means, in this context, matches where the top priority is to win, i.e. tournament and league matches. (You should also try to win practice matches, but they are also just that – practice, where you both practice your shots and techniques, and practice finding ways to win.) But much of this depends on your opponent. And for this, I’m dividing them into three types. (Some top players or coaches will disagree with this and would say to treat all opponents at all levels the same. There’s no problem with that. Whatever works best for you.)

“Serious” opponents are those where the match is competitive, or the opponent is much stronger. You should throw whatever you have at them, tactically. I could write a whole book on this.

“Practice” opponents are those who can play, but are not threats to you. There’s no point in throwing every tricky serve you have at them once you’ve established that you can dominate nearly every point. Against players like this, once you’ve verified that the match isn’t competitive, you can turn them into practice matches – always with the provision that you can go back to pure winning tactics at any time.

For example, I might serve short backspin over and over against such a player, he’ll push it back, and I’ll start every rally by looping. Not only should I dominate this way, but I get great practice from it – which prepares me for the next match. (I could also fake backspin and serve no-spin, and he’d likely pop it up, giving me an easy put-away – but I wouldn’t get as much practice with that, would I? Stronger players will mostly keep the ball low, and will rarely pop the ball up like that.) PLUS – in that rare time where you do run into trouble, you can always fall back on what worked before, such as your trickier serves – and by not using them as much earlier, the opponent isn’t used to them, and so they are doubly effective. To use the USATT rating system, if I were 2300 and my opponent was, say, 1500, then once I’ve established that he really is 1500, and perhaps won the first game easily, I might play the rest of the way for practice. You can judge for yourself at what level a match might be competitive for you.

A key thing – and read this three times – is that you don’t let up mentally. You still play each point to win, you just don’t bother with your best serves or best tactics as long as you are dominating without them. If you let up mentally, that could cost you in the next match, and perhaps even in this match. Always remember that it’s easier to keep your focus then to recover it once lost.

An alternate version for some players is play the rest of the match perhaps just pushing and blocking, so as not to tire yourself out for the next match. I know of some older or out-of-shape players who do this. Another option is to use the match to practice your best serves. I’ve done both. You can also differentiate based on the event you are playing. If you are playing for a national or state title, you might treat each match differently than if it’s at a small, monthly event.

“Beginner” opponents are just that – beginners, or beginning-intermediate players. Some like to play for the 11-0 win; others give a mercy point. That’s up to you. I tend to throw a few good serves at them now and then so they can see them, but mostly just rally with them, and use the match to loosen up. If I am up 10-0, I’ll usually put one up a bit to their forehand and challenge them to hit one past me. Matches like this are actually good mental preparation – if you can keep your focus throughout the match, even while not playing fully serious, you can probably do so in your next, more competitive match.

The problem with being down 0-2 in a match isn't that you are down 0-2; it's that you are being outplayed. If you outplay your opponent the rest of the way, then you'll likely win the next three games. So, don't worry about the game score. Focus on your performance and tactics and you'll maximize your chances of outplaying your opponent the rest of the way, and thereby winning the next three. And remember that what happened before can’t change and so doesn’t matter anymore. Only the next point counts.

So, what happened in those first two games? (Related question– what happened in the first game that you failed to correct in the second?) You need to figure out what he’s winning on or what you are losing on, and change it to what you are winning on or what he’s losing on. Sometimes it’s a matter of tactics. Other times it’s a matter of getting a shot to work better. For example, if you are losing in backhand-to-backhand exchanges the first two games, you have two options: Get out of those types of rallies (tactics), or focus on playing your backhand better (getting a shot to work better). If you are pretty sure you can’t win unless you do better in those backhand-to-backhand rallies, guess what? Instead of avoiding them, start the rally looking to get into them, and with that mindset, maybe you’ll do better in them.

Sometimes it’s something simple that turns everything around, such as attacking the opponent’s middle (elbow) during those backhand-to-backhand rallies, one of those most common ways I’ve seen a match turn around. Whatever it is, find it – it’s usually something simple. And if you still lose, then learn for next time so you don’t fall behind again.

Ultimately, the best thing is to avoid having to come back from down 0-2 – and that means scouting out your opponent so you know what to do at the start, have a working game plan, and warming up properly for the match. Then go in with a clear mind and battle it out!

The single most important thing you have to adjust to with any given opponent is usually their serve. Many players take a game or so to do so. But there’s a shortcut, and a secret of mine and many top coaches and players.

If you have a match coming up, it’s great to study his game, either live or on video. When I coach at tournaments, at the start I always put together a list of opponents my students – or me, if I’m playing – will play. Then I find videos of them – Youtube is your friend. (Put in the name of the player followed by “Table Tennis.”) But the single most important thing to watch is the serve. Don’t just watch it; you or your student should imagine receiving it as they watch it. Even stand up and go through the motions of doing so. I often assign players to watch upcoming opponents with the focus on their serve. If they are watching the upcoming opponent live, then I have them stand and watch from directly behind the opponent’s opponent, so they can imagine seeing and returning the serve. By the time the match starts, they should be somewhat comfortable against them – which often may save them from losing that first game, which they otherwise would have spent adjusting to the serve.

Here is a great way to understand how the mind should operate during a table tennis rally. If you play a musical instrument, you don't consciously play a song; your subconscious does. Each note triggers the next note. In table tennis, whatever your opponent does triggers your next move. It’s the same thing, with the one exception that in music, there’s no indecision as you know in advance each note you will play. But it’s really the same thing – just as your subconscious directs your moves when playing a musical instrument, your subconscious should direct your reactive moves when playing table tennis.

What does this mean? It means that, just as with the music example, you have to let go and let the subconscious do its job. Your conscious job is to think simple tactics and keep your eyes on the ball and opponent, and let the subconscious do the rest. If you are even an advanced beginner, it’ll do a MUCH better job than your conscious mind can! Not sure about this? Try tying your shoes where you have to consciously guide each move. That’s you trying to consciously guide yourself in table tennis. Or, to use the music example, try playing an instrument where you have to consciously decide on each note before playing it. Good luck!

So, as I’ve advised many times, let your subconscious do its job, and guess what? YOU get the credit!